Thursday, August 20, 2015


hello readers. 

really don't feel like writing today. got so many works to do. so many things need to be settled. yet so little times. i don't know though, my mind is a mess, so does my life. been wondering lately how i'm going to face the challenges and possibilities in life. honestly, i'm not even ready to be living as a student again. maybe because i don't like the ideas of being far away from home. but there's nothing i can do with it, so yeah. it is what it is. 

how can i cure the emptiness in me? like i don't know why i'm feeling empty but i know something's missing. just unable to figure it out. i tried writing poems, thoughts. it helps to distract me for a while but then i'll feel it again. you know, the urge to have someone that listens to your stories and jokes around with you. making you forget about the sadistic world. i need that. oh well, i just figured out the things i'm missing. 

i hate waking up early in the morning. i hate getting nagged in the morning. heck, i even hate hearing someone's getting nagged at. like seriously, the day is just starting and you're already so motivated to open your mouth and just babble everything inside your mind? how, just how. i don't even have strength to look at people faces in the morning. maybe that sums up why i am a loner but seriously, just let me enjoy my few days at home because i'm sure as hell can't to do this in uni later. 

i do despise of being compelled. i mean, you can talk wisely though if you want to ask someone to do something. not by blaming something happens because the person you're compelling didn't adhere to your desire. it's one of God's work, right? open up your mind. i thought you're an adult now, but you're seriously didn't act like one. truth be told, i lost my respect towards you. like seriously, you have the audacity to blame the providence and incriminate someone just because she didn't want to obey you? 

along my eighteen years and eight months of living, that was the stupidest statement i've ever heard. honestly, make up your dimwitted mind. you're so far up the institution's ass that you don't even know how to differentiate bad and good things. i'm sorry but seriously, stop blaming others. blaming people on something does not make things happened to be unhappened. can you get it now? i hope you understand this, because if you don't, idk what to say anymore. 

that's it. i'm done. i'm done ranting, shading and babbling. lol. bye. 

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